Just another day....

Just another one of those days where I had to wake up before the crack of dawn to catch an early morning flight to Delhi and get meetings done. Only this time I switched to Jetlite (or Sahara as it used to be called before Jet Airways took it over) as I'd travelled by it before and found the service and food quite good, and more importantly, plenty of leg room. Furthermore, I got a low fare on this as compared to Jet. The breakfast I looked forward to, though, turned out to be just short of a disaster. So, I was relieved when I reached the office at Gurgaon and a very good friend treated a colleague and me to brunch.

Well, this was a busy day in the Group as the (worldwide) head honcho was visiting and when we got to one of the Group's newly occupied buildings where he'd been, we found security extremely tight - electronically controlled gates, fingerprint scanning and identification (or whatever it's called), et al - not very common here. So I got my work completed successfully and this lovely young lady I'd been only communicating with over the phone until I finally met her (on that day) showed us around the place. A huge cafetaria, a gym, and more than just two cubicles in the restroom. You could virtually live in the office. For a moment I stopped and imagined what that would be like and then the thought intruded, "Nah, wrong city."

The flight back was delayed and tiredness hit as I spent more than two hours at the airport trying to get on with 'The Aeneid' but struggling to keep awake. Too tired to stand and too scared to fall asleep. It was with a sense of relief that I finally boarded the flight for home. Settled down in my aisle seat when Mr. Eager Beaver tries to get past me to his window seat knowing fully well that the narrow gap between my knees and the seat ahead made such a task next to impossible. "Have patience," I said. "I'll get up and you can go in." Once the doors were shut, it was a relief to know that the seat between Mr. Eager Beaver and me was vacant and that I wouldn't have to struggle to get elbow room. But later on, after an awful dinner, this Ms. Restless sitting one row ahead on the other side says to Mr. Eager Beaver, "If you're going to go to sleep, can I take your window seat? You can sit in the middle." "And what," I wanted to ask her, "do you expect to see from the window at this time of the night?" But I held my tongue. Later, I thought she must have just wanted to run away from her own seat because of that Punjabi guy ahead of her. He really was a piece of s%*#. From the time he got on board, he'd been making a nuisance of himself. Pushed the seat as far back as possible and stretched his hands so they hung over the top of the seat from his elbows on. Then he decided to read the newspaper by keeping the seat still reclined but moving to the (front) edge and opening the newspaper wide so it rested on the seat ahead and also on the unfortunate head of its occupant. That gentleman did turn around and protest but Mr. Yucks dealt with the situation by just folding the newspaper in half lengthwise and keeping his hands on both the (side) edges near the top of the newspaper in such a manner that Mr. Unfortunate was now in the unenviable situation of not only having the paper resting on his head but also a couple of undesirable hands. How people can accept such behaviour is beyond me!!

Anyway, Ms. Restless was firmly ensconced in her window seat and Mr. Eager Beaver was sitting next to me wondering how to pass his time now that his sleep had been disturbed. He hit upon this brilliant idea of switching his cell on. I'm not sure what the situation is like in other countries but here, mobile devices are to be switched off before takeoff and can be switched on only when the aircraft has come to a complete halt. Easier to preach than to put into effect considering the number of people we have who pride themselves on their logical thinking. "Logic," said Mr. Eager Beaver when I told him to switch off his cell. "I'm getting no signal; ergo, my keeping my cell on can't interfere with the aircraft's communication system. In any case, I am only supposed to put it off at takeoff and landing." "You're wrong. And tell me that when the plane crashes," I said. "If you have a doubt about it, we can always get the flight attendant to resolve it." He switched off his cell then but apparently had come to a decision that, since he couldn't sleep any more, he may as well pass the time in conversation with his neighbour, namely, yours truly. "So," he says, "are you from Mumbai or from Delhi?" "Mumbai." "And are you a housewife or a professional?" By this time I was starting to get irritated and, apologies to any housewives who might be reading this but, I snapped, "Do I look like a housewife?" "No," he squeaked. And that was that thankfully.

Then I realised that this was my second 'close encounter of the third kind' of the day. Or should that be 'close encounter of the third kind with the weird kind' ? For the morning's flight also had me sitting next to a chap who hadn't switched off his cellphone. It rang a number of times and got me awake and groggily trying to figure out where the sound was coming from. "It can't be this guy," I thought, since the stewardess was standing right there and wasn't saying a thing and then moved away. The phone continued to ring. So I asked him, "Is that your cell?" "Oh, it's ringing? I didn't realise." "Put it off now. Do you not realise you are endangering everyone on board? You're old enough not to have to be told these things." Not even a squeak from this smartass.

So all in all, this made me feel that most people prefer to look the other way or pretend a situation does not exist or even tolerate an uncomfortable situation. Why? To avoid confrontation? Possibly. I'm guilty of doing that at times too if I feel that making a point is just not worth it. Or is it that people don't like to get out of their comfort zones? Or, because they're simply scared and hold others in awe? Or for some other reason?

Whatever the case, in my view, people need to realise that they can't always assume the role of a silent spectator. Sometimes, you need to get involved in a situation and/or tackle it head-on. Because, sometimes, one person or a single act of his can make a world of difference.

Pet peeves

We all have our pet peeves. These are some of mine:

• Cigarette smoke and those who smoke around non-smokers.
• Body odour and those who try and mask it by spraying perfume regardless of whether others can stand it or not.
• Dirty loos and people who leave them that way.
• People not washing their hands after visiting the loo.
• People trying to take advantage of you, in any form or manner.
• Those who take their own time moving on a crowded street as though they're taking a walk in the park and those who block the entire path.
• Those who let the rain run down their open umbrella down someone else's back.
• Convenient memories, especially when it comes to paying back money.
• Those who decide to go dutch with you and then don't even offer to pay you the money or when they do, they conveniently don't reimburse you their share of a substantial tip.
• Those who think it is their right to dirty a public place.
• The tinny music coming from the headphones of a person near you and the fact that people feel when they listen to their music in a public place, it should be loud enough for everyone else to hear, whether on headphones or otherwise. All the worse if it's James Blunt they're listening to.
• Travelling in Mumbai local trains/buses especially during peak hour - the experience of a lifetime.
• Those who don't return things they borrow, or when they do, it can't be recognised.
• Abuse of books and people who practise it. I hate it when pages are folded to mark a place, or the covers are made to meet, back to back, or when books are used to keep track of what you ate on a particular day, or when pages are ripped off,...
• Those who take credit for the tasks you do or try and push the blame on to you for something that goes wrong.
• Those who don't even have the decency to say a simple 'thank you' when you help them out. You don't do things because you expect people to return the favour but I don't think expecting just a 'thank you' is out of place. The same goes with acknowledging greetings/wishes on birthdays, anniversaries, festivals, etc.
• Know-it-alls.
• Spam mail.
• The fact that I can't remember anything else at the moment.

Pets

I miss my doga a great deal. Thing is one never realises how much you have until you don't have it anymore. With pets, you get so used to having them around that one doesn't realise how much they help by just being there.

It's an amazing feeling to come back home after a long day and have your dog come up to you. Or when she sits by you when you're feeling blue and down and out. Or have her follow you around when you dance the tango. Or watch the kittens run all around the place trying their best to grab hold of a tail, any tail. Or realise the best way to drink milk, kitten style, is to climb into the vessel itself.

Pet owners could tell you a lot of tales. Pets make you laugh. They reduce the stress levels. Never did I realise this more than after my doga left. A point that was reinforced the other day when I left the office feeling really miserable and felt my spirits lift just after I petted a police dog. :)

Earth angels

It was a little after 8 p.m. of 28th December, 2006, when we lost our beloved rott, Taffy. While the grief was very much there, the major worry was what to do with the body. Well, we hadn't concreted a section of the compound for this purpose only. But moving the huge stones that covered it, digging the grave and shifting the body (all of 42 kgs.) down from the first floor where we stay seemed a herculean effort for me and my mom. Just shifting her on to a rug with my cousin's help took a great deal of effort on all our parts. Attempts to find someone nearby who could help were unsuccessful. I did what I usually do in such situations. Sent a prayer to St. Michael, the Archangel, for help. At 9:30, things were still the same. Told my mom, "Let's go down to the hardware store and pick up the necessary digging implements. We'll do it ourselves."

The first two shops we visited had already closed down. The third was, fortunately, open. When we asked for what we wanted, a man sitting out front asked us what it was needed for.

"Our dog is dead and we need to bury her. We can't find anyone to do it. So we're doing it ourselves."

"I'll come and do it."

And he did, along with a friend of his. Painters who were picking up a few provisions on their way back home. Our earth angels.

So, they came. Dug the grave in just a few minutes, carried our baby down with such love and care and even said goodbye to her. Which, of course, was tough for all of us. Even stopped by a few days later to check on the grave and see how we were doing.

It's difficult not to marvel at how the Universe handled everything. The way things just fell into place. Just when you think a situation is hopeless, something happens to change it. As long as there is hope. And faith.

Random acts of kindness

A Readers' Digest survey last year said that people in Mumbai are among the rudest in the world. Fortunately, there are people who prove them wrong and will continue to do so. Leaving a shop this morning with my hands full, it was really nice to have a college girl hold the door open for me. It brought back a few memories as well.

Standing in heavy rain, praying that an empty cab would come your way, when all of a sudden a perfect stranger offers you a lift, turns to the grumbling cab driver and says, "In times like this, you should never hesitate to help people."

On another occasion, I'd left the office at 10 in the night. Normally, I'd enjoy the 10 minute walk to the station but no way was that possible at that hour. The cab driver refused the short run; so I paced up and down hoping for one to stop. 10:30 and still no luck. I was beginning to get desperate when the cabbie told me he'd changed his mind, so get in, it's not safe for you to be out here all alone. Yes, it was dangerous but sometimes you have no choice and sometimes you just need to trust.

Visiting a friend who'd lost her mum, I was handed over a blank Christmas card. "She couldn't write it but she'd picked it up for you and she wanted you to have it." That was a tough moment and had me in tears.

But never did more strangers play a role in my life on a single day than years ago when I was desperately searching for a job. So, I'd cleared the written tests conducted by a reputed company here and having an interview scheduled for 1:00 p.m., set off from the house at 11:15 a.m. Getting a bus itself was an ordeal and by the time I'd reached the railway station, a little over 2 km away, it was already noon. Then I had to decide which of the serpentine queues to join. At 12:45, there were around 20 to 25 people still ahead of me and more behind, when the ticket window closed - for lunch. There I was not knowing what to do, on the verge of tears, when the man behind me asked me where I wanted to go. "I'll have your ticket booked," he said. "My friend is just near the ticket counter of the other window. Just tell me where."

Having that out of the way, I did manage to get a train and reach the railway station (at my destination) around 1. Walking the length of the platform, seeking directions to the auto-rickshaw stand, somehow or the other, all the persons I'd asked directed me to the left instead of to the right. To my horror, there were just two or three rickshaws available - hardly what one would expect. Anyway, it turned out that the company I was visiting had two entrances - the main entrance, which was accessible from the highway, and the side entrance, open only to company vehicles. Apparently, the rickshaw driver didn't know the place well and took me via the side entrance where we were stopped by security. By this time, I truly felt the fates were conspiring against me. It was hot, I was tired, there seemed to be hurdles at every stage and I was ready to throw in the towel. Well, I explained the situation to the security guard who told me to pay off the guy and send him on his way. Which I did. "Now what ?" I said. The answer was another security guard roaring up on a Bullet and saying, "Hop on. Will drop you off." I made it to the place at around 1:30, cooled down, finished with the interview and the written test, and a few days later got a call telling me I'd topped and that the job was mine if I wanted it.

If I were in the same situation today, I probably would have just cabbed the distance. But at that time I was almost broke and didn't have much money. Plus I was a little green around the ears, didn't know what the world had in store and still had to build up my self-confidence. It's said that we need to learn things from situations. Perhaps, it was the Universe's way of letting me know that when all seems lost, it isn't. When you have hope and trust that things will work out, or when things are meant to happen, they will. In the most unexpected ways. And, sometimes, with a little help from people you wouldn't normally look at twice.

So, the next time you feel like doing something for someone, don't think. Just go ahead and do it. You never know how it would affect that person's life. Or yours.

Personal space

Why do people find it so difficult to get the meaning of those two simple words ?

Was standing on the church porch listening to mass on Saturday when this guy just comes and plonks himself in front of me. So close that had he just to take a step back, it would have been on my foot. No amount of throat clearing helped; some people are conveniently deaf.

So, I tapped him on the shoulder and said, "Could you please shift a bit ?"

"Why ?"

"Because you are standing too close to me and I do not like it."

Hardly subtle. But at least he moved away.

Sometimes you just can't avoid being rude.

Water, water, everywhere

It's been raining cats and dogs since yesterday and if the weather continues like this, I guess a lot of people would be spending their Sundays at home.

Not that it makes much of a difference to me. As I have my schedule all chalked out. The major part of the day involves catching up with work but a few hours this evening have been put aside for the motogp at Donington Park.

Anyway, on a day like this, I'd really rather be in than out. Somehow, though it's nice to step out in the rain, I can't see myself battling such inclement weather. Which is what it seems to be at the moment - with thunder and lightning at 9:30 in the morning. Even worse than that are the streets here. As it is, in normal circumstances you need to watch your step else you may end up with more on your foot than just your shoe. Can you imagine how it is in the rains ! You can't see where you're going because the streets are waterlogged. Step out of home in freshly washed, newly pressed clothes and within a few seconds, if you're not careful, you have muck all over them. And sometimes, even if you tread carefully. Because some people who never seem to be able to grow out of the childhood activity of splashing around in puddles like to literally spread their 'joy' to those around. As do a number of motorists. Perhaps clean clothes are boring - they look much better with dark spots of muck. The more the better. ;-) A quicker way of sprucing up ones attire is simply to lose ones footing in a ditch or to step into an open manhole - not a very difficult task in normal weather; the rains simply make it easier.

Having said that, I do like the rains. Though I long for the sun when it pours and I yearn for the rains when the sun beats down mercilessly. But, hey, I'm only human.